Friday, July 18, 2008

Is unfulfilled Promise a White Lie?

Is an unfulfilled promise a white lie?
After reading a message from a friend about when a guy doesn’t fulfill a promise made to his girlfriend, the outcome of it is being punished.


What does the word mean?

It’s a verbal commitment by one person to another agreeing to do (or not to do) something in the future.

I remember when I was with my ex, he made a lot of promises. But most of the time, his promises will soon be forgotten or he thinks it’s not important. I say; if it’s not important that it will be forgotten, then in the first place, why make that promise? So has that promise turned into a white lie, or worst still, it was intended to be a white lie from the start?

Now, let’s see what the dictionary defines lying;

It is to state something one knows is false with the intention that it be taken for the truth by someone else.

White Lie
Causes no discord if it were uncovered and offers some benefit to the liar or the hearer, or both.

I believe in a relationship, white lies are unavoidable. I also believe that most guys will opt to lie or provide empty promises believing that it will not cause any further arguments or unwanted debate with their girlfriend. Lying is truly unavoidable. Lying will be beneficial either to the person who lies or the person who receives it, but usually it is the person who lies that benefits. Beneficial until the balloon burst and the feeling of being betrayed and disappoinment aroused. And the trust somehow gone.

What I do believe is that, trust is truly essential to make a relationship work. If trust is destroyed by numerous innocent white lies or unfulfilled promises, it will be very difficult to build that trust again. Then, how can a relationship work with the presence of doubt? How can a person be truly happy when he/she has to wonder all the time if the other half is telling the truth or making empty promises again?

I know how it feels because I’ve been doing that for many years. Until I cannot stand the emotional torture that I had to tell myself over and over again that it doesn’t matter and start making excuses for him. I’m sure I’m not the only one. A lot of my friends will tell me that there are people or relationships that have gone through worst. I know. I’ve seen. I’ve heard. And I’ve accepted the fact that it is part of the relationship package.

Why all these craps about promises and white lies here?

Well, a few hours ago, I've just had another experience in unfulfilled promises once again by that same person. I guess people never change. I'm not emotional on this issue, but I still cannot get it, why promise when one don't intend to deliver? Sigh.

Sometimes, a simple 'NO' is good enough. No obligations.

Thursday, July 17, 2008

Venture Out

Can you find it within yourself to appreciate and even enjoy what you do not like? By so doing, you will experience a sense of acceptance, peace and power. Can you learn to be understanding and patient when you have been angered, frustrated, or inconvenienced? Do so, and you'll discover a highly effective way to move forward no matter what. Are you able to respect and explore an opinion or perspective with which you disagree? That can add real strength and conviction to your own perspective.

Life's richness does not come from just staying with what is familiar, comfortable and pleasurable. It is when you venture out, away from the familiar, that you grow stronger and more capable. Hold tightly to your core values while at the same time opening your mind and your heart to new thoughts, feelings and experiences. Your own perspective will grow stronger when you look at if from other perspectives. Find wats to provide a healthy challenge for your understanding of life. And you'll learn to understand, to discover and to experience so very much more.
-Ralph Marston

Friday, July 4, 2008

The mysteries of LOVE; The power of HOPE

LOVE is the only thing, that make us different of all evil, and of that inert nature, which does not think and does not feel.

It is very certain that love, sometimes, changes from red flower and becomes the blood of an open wound.It is also true, that sometimes, it blinds and dazzles us, as when looking at the sun, but love, however much cruel, it may seem to you, it always teaches you to give everything.And if there is something that can be rescued from the suffering, is that love, made you fly and know the heaven of gods.
Why are mortals to blame for loving with the feeling that make us to lose reason?
But love does not die, love lives in you, suffers in you, cries for you, but remember this, love will revive and the day will come where you will find that love never, never, deceived you.Rather, were some persons that didn't know, didn't appreciate the true meaning and the reason of the verb to Love.

Does that mean there is still hope to love....?


....the power of hope.....

In the enchanted forest the trees withered and the lakes and rivers dried. The birds stop singing and flew away from the sky. The flowers withered also, the sun got darker and not even the moon showed her pale shine. The wind froze. Everything seems...dead...The days passed and the earth was dry because the enchanted forest became full of demons and their howls and shrieks were heard.

That enchanted forest was sad and desolated. Everything is destroyed. The beauty of the once enchanted forest gone.More time passed but one day a very small light appeared in that enchanted forest, that light would grow more and more every day. The light became large and full of colors and the fields became full of flowers.

The terrified demons went away.
The lakes and rivers were full again with abundant fish. The sky became full of colors, the moon was shining. The valleys became green with plenty of delicious fruits. The forest became splendorous.How could that small light changed everything?
It transformed everything. It all came back to life.

They could not deadly wound Love.
Because the light of Hope will live forever in that enchanted forest.

**Will the light of hope, someday, shine in me too?**

Thursday, July 3, 2008

Time waits for no one...

Another day has just flew by without me even realizing it........again........... Time is truly precious because time is so limited. Day after day, month after month.. To think that I have to tackle so many tasks with so little time, is just so scary. Sigh~

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Yesterday is history, tomorrow is mystery, today is a gift

Advice from Master Oogway; Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, & today is a gift.

Kungfu Panda is not only entertaining and funny but added a touch of humane advices as well that reminds me again of what I always tend to forget. When Master Oogway appointed the cubby, clumsy but adorable Panda as the Dragon Warrior, Master Shifu struggles to accept Oogway’s insistence that there are no accidents in the universe and that we are not truly in control of our circumstances. Well, everything happens for a reason. That reason alone will bear the fruit from the seed we have planted.

There’s also another lesson learnt from the movie, “There is no secret ingredient that makes a great warrior, the power comes from the simple faith in you. If you believe you are a great warrior, then you are a great warrior”. That simple word alone “Believe” will make everything happen. When you believe you can, then you will gain that confident in you that give you all the power and encouragement to go all for it. Such simple theory and yet everyday so many people is struggling in life because they don’t have that believe in their heart.

I have always been a quiet little girl who is so afraid to talk to people and always keep myself a distance from others. Since young I was taught to obey rules and never do otherwise. That’s a sad story that I don’t want to repeat again. Anyhow, since joining pageants and winning titles, my life has changed. I have learnt to love myself more and accept myself for who I am. I have also gained that so needed “Believe in myself” theory from all the workshops and seminars that I have attended in the past. It was a struggle at first, but looking back, seeing myself change from that little cowardly girl to who I am now is truly a miracle. I have learnt so much, changed so much, experienced so much; and all that have made me who I am today. Although I am no one great, nor am I someone special but I have to say that I am so proud of what I have achieved so far.

So why am I not happy everyday? Seeing how my parents are getting older and weaker in health is disturbing, the stress and high expectations at work is exhausting, having gone through a failed relationship (my first one too) is so disappointing and heartbreaking, and liking someone but don’t dare to admit because afraid of another failure is even more exhausting! Well, life is always a challenge. A test maybe? To test whether I’ve learnt my lesson and do better next time, or to test if I have the wisdom to deal with a difficult situation? Maybe, it’s just the way of life to make the journey more colourful and interesting and not regretting it at the end of the journey.

I was at the hospital the whole day today because my dad was admitted to the hospital because of his heart problem. Looking at all the patients suffering with tubes and needles and trying their very best to stay alive is really depressing. The only thing the doctor is able to tell us are “We‘ll try another type of medication to control his situation” and “We don’t know yet, but we will monitor him”……

Health is truly priceless. Health & happiness goes hand-in-hand and both have something in common. No money in the world is able to buy them. But sadly, it is also something people don’t appreciate until they have lost them. I only hope that at the end of my journey, I won’t spend it in the hospital struggling to stay alive. I want to spend the last days of my journey with families & friends and of course with lots of laughter and pure happiness. This is also something that we cannot purchase off the shelves