Friday, February 5, 2010

Depression symptoms

Last night I have decided to let go of all anger in life... I hope... it is certainly challenging to release every single anger in life and start afresh. Anyhow, I am in desperate condition to change my approach to life as last night an alarm bell rang when I ticked "yes" to 15 out of 18 symptoms of the depression list.

Funny how my life turned out when my only wish in life is to be happy.

After reading that list, I meditated for about 20 minutes and realized that all those accumulated anger is making me miserable. However, I have been trying to suppress those anger by appearing cheerful and easy-going. The anger is then left undissolved and accumulated over the years waiting to explode sometime in the near future. I am already near exploding... no p
oint waiting to find out when it will explode.

Today, while I was stuck in heavy traffic, I observed people driving recklessly and furiously. Again, I realized that these people are suffering from accumulated anger suppressed painfully in their inner soul... waiting for the explosion.

So... consider myself lucky to realize this sooner than later. At least then I can find ways to deal with them rather than wait blindly for the explosion. The first step I am going to take will be to look at all circumstances in a different perspective and stay away from overly judging the consequences. In more simple words, I will use my compassion instead.

Spread love instead... never wait for others to give you the love you need...
Start with yourself

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