Thursday, March 5, 2009

Four Great Friends, a Dinner & Men Interrogation!

Today is definitely a wonderful day as I get to catch up with three of my best friends over delicious steamboat at Taman Desa. Reasonable price plus clean environment were definitely other plus points!

We chatted for almost 3 hours about work, friends and men. We still need to have men as one of the main topic as it is a time for us to reveal troubled thoughts about men; wonder why some men are behaving in such ways that we do not understand and believe we never will. Almost resembling scenes from ‘Sex & the City’ girls’ talk; minus the extreme sex talk!

Well, are men really from Mars and women from Venus? I believe to a certain extend it is true because the author of the book would not have made up the whole concept blindly. There is also another book titled ‘Why Men Love Bitches’ by Sherry Argov which is another version of ‘Men are from Mars and Women from Venus’. Only this book is authored by a women and stating points from a women’s point of view.

The word ‘BITCH’ here is not referring to women who are mean or cruel but strong women who has her own identity and is secure with who she is, women who are clear about what she will or will not accept and not afraid to back away at the slightest whiff of disrespect.

Although some principles shared in the book are great ideas but mostly are just entertaining and fun to read. I always believe that when two people get together, the most important effort is communication, trust and respect. Without any of the three would spell disaster for the relationship. Of course, saying is always easier than truly implementing it into our relationships.

As for me, my dear friends have made me realized that it is the fear of being abandon again that stopped me from fully committing into a relationship. I do believe that if a man is patience enough to guide and regain my confidence and beliefs in love, I would certainly let my guard down. Afterall, I am a person who wants romance and always believe in fairy tale endings. I grew up with Cinderella and Snow White, like them I am waiting for my hero and knight in shining armor to rescue me!

**If you happen to be rolling your eyes at this moment, I would like to enlighten your goodself that having fantasies are absolutely healthy for your mind & soul**

Anyway, I know I need to overcome this fear. Every time I thought I am able to, some incidents might come up and dragged me back into my cocoon. Sigh.

Don’t misunderstand; I am an independant woman and I am also not a woman who believes in playing the field or dating different partners at the same time before choosing the right one to settle down. It is not easy for me to have the 'spark' or some may call it ‘chemistry’ with a guy. I admit I am attracted to smart, intelligent gentlemen rather than looks or how deep or large his bank account or accounts!

When a guy has nothing to flaunt but his money, I will not be shy to tell him to keep his money to take care of himself and not to bother dangling it in front of me as I don’t respond to that! Some people truly thinks money can buy anything in this world!
**This phrase is commented with eyes rolling and a taste of disgust**

One example is the 4 Cs’ that some “SMART” people have come up with; Credit Cards, Cars, Carat, Comics? Clueless maybe! Or Cartoons! **Laughs**

I have dated rich guys with imported sports cars and good looking as well but don’t have a clue on where the conversation was heading to. I mean, I was the one who doesn’t have a clue on what and where the conversation was heading too. Sigh. That’s the biggest turn off of the century! I better stop commenting on such men as I know I am going to sound bitchy about the whole topic.

I have also dated guys who are thoughtful, caring, smart and intelligent plus truly 100% gentlemen and know how to treat a lady with respect. Guys whom I respect in return and enjoy being in their company.

So, why am I still feeling insecure?
Maybe the answer would be to let go of ‘thinking’ too much and just concentrate and appreciate the present moment, the moment of being rescued and protected by my 'hero', especially since I can almost feel the warmth engulfing my heart.

Anyway, it was a wonderful evening spent with the girls and I am glad to have taken the initiative to gather the girls for tonight. Once again, I stressed on how blessed to have great friends in my life!

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